I only started the downward slop when I started working in 2018. And yet, I have had body dysmorphia and eating disorders since the age of 10-12. When I found out I was pregnant in Dec 2019 I was 98 Kgs, I believe the heaviest I have been would be around 105 Kgs. At the end of my pregnancy I weighed 102 Kgs - which I was proud of, I had gained the recommended amount I was expecting far more. Then breastfeeding started. I was burning calories quick but it triggered my binge eating as the constant hunger led to over-eating & comfort eating when the post partum depression hit hard. And just as quick as I lost the 20 Kgs after my son's birth (in about 4-6 months), I gained back about 12 Kgs - bringing my starting weight to 95.2 Kgs. There was no premeditation to this, no "I will start Monday/2022". I just woke up & started my day as usual - and then I thought to download a calorie counting app, (which I had tried in the past, and failed) I started with a small goal, no mindless eating. And somehow this is the first time I feel not only motivated (thanks to physical results) but also no urge to binge. I am so mindful. And to be honest, I think I have my son to thank for that. Because I want him growing up without an eating disorder, I want him growing up with a mom who gets in the pool with him & can run after him. I am excited to be heading that direction. With every small goal achieved the excitement grows. I am already under the weight I was after loosing so much due to breastfeeding. Next goal; get under 80 Kgs for the first time since High School!