Diario de l_ou_ise, 31 ene. 17

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I apologize in advance for the lack of positivity in this post. I didn't weigh because I felt extremely bad and didn't need to add to it.

On Friday at practice I was trying to catch my flyer's foot and it landed on the last knuckle of my left ring finger, and apparently my finger was bent and it caught all of her weight and I heard a crack and it hurt really bad. I stopped practicing because I know my body and I knew the pain wasn't just due to the shock. My coaches were saying I had probably sprained something but I FELT it in my body that it was something else (also it was starting to swell...)

I slept on it bc practice always finishes late and I get home by midnight so I was like eh it won't be much worse in the morning anyway. The pain was bad so I could barely sleep and on saturday I went to the pharmacy to get something to bandage it into place so it wouldn't move (I couldn't straighten it and it was swollen and kinda blue) in the hope that it wasn't broken. The pharmacist had a glance at it and said go to the ER right now I am 95% sure it's broken.

So on an empty stomach on a Saturday I spent my ENTIRE afternoon in the ER and in pain. My tendon is torn and when it broke it took at bit of the bone with it, hence the pain and the swelling. I have to wear a splinter and keep my finger completely straight for at LEAST a month and might have to have surgery if the tendon doesn't heal correctly. That means no cheerleading competition in march. No more lifting. Basically all I can do safely is cycle on a stationary bike bc if I run I might trip and fall on it. It makes me so sad because I really was loking forward to competing.

Also my parents were like "oh it's just a finger you can still run" and that sounded a lot like "still not an excuse to stay fat" and it made me want to cry really loud because I never realised me being fat could ever bother them more than me literally breaking a bone.

Anyway. Hopefully I'll find my mojo back soon enough but today I kind of just want to cry and eat ice cream, but since payday hasn't arrived yet AND I don't want to binge I'm just going to go to work and cry in bed tonight. Life is tough sometimes.

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Oh poor you - that must have been really painful. Is the splint helping? If you were to go running and fall you'd probably do a lot more damage - and if you put it in a sling so you wouldn't automatically put it down, you'd either break something on the other arm or your face. Not good. Would they support you to a month's gym membership where you can hold on while exercising?

31 ene. 17 por el miembro: minitata

@Minitata Thank you for your encouraging words. It did hurt a lot but the splint is helping. They gave me very powerful painkillers but I'm sticking to the paracetalmol from now on because the strong ones made me so dizzy and drowsy haha it was fun over the weekend but I need to function during the week. I do have a gym membership so I will be going there to do some cycling. I just wish my parents didn't think it was their god given right to comment on my body. Oh well. They're not gonna change now so I might as well adapt!

31 ene. 17 por el miembro: l_ou_ise

Hey I'm 62 and my mother still thinks she can command my life. My dad, who has passed, used to use the line of 'how can you do this to me?' whenever I did anything he didn't like. Just take a deep breath and smile sweetly. Remember you can't help their attitude, but you are in control of your response.

31 ene. 17 por el miembro: minitata

It is times like that, when you realize just because people are adults, does not mean that they have any sense, and you learn to trust your own instincts. Starting with the coaches who didn't immediately have your hand checked by a medical professional you learn how other people's blindness can be detrimental to your health. Protect your whole hand, not just the broken finger. Take care, hope it gets better soon.

31 ene. 17 por el miembro: MCslimmer

It's called a mallet deformity and I've had one and my sis has had four (she has stroppy horses and I had mine shut in a door). It does mend although the joint will be enlarged and you may have a little pain when the weather is cold. However, the body is amazing and it will mend as long as you keep the splint on. MC is right, your coaches should be ashamed of themselves. As to your parents - meh - I was 7.5st at 5'6" and my father called me Charolais legs (if you're not up on your cattle Charolais cows are extremely squat and chunky) although I was underweight and VERY slim at the time (size 6 I think). It's their problem, not yours, you just do your thing your way and reach your goals in your time. We're here if you ever want to rant. You'll get there lovely, one lb at a time :)

31 ene. 17 por el miembro: StrangeTrout


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